On Wednesday, I realized I was going to a baby shower this weekend and I hadn't obtained the requisite baby gift. I wandered out to a website that I'm particularly fond of and ordered some disturbingly cute baby accoutrement. I wisely chose to drop the extra coin on overnight delivery to be safe, and unwisely chose DHL over UPS because they were a few bucks cheaper. Delivery was to be guaranteed by 3 p.m. on Thursday.
At 3:30 on Thursday my package was nowhere to be found, and the website indicated that it was frolicking in Ohio somewhere. I called the 800 number and after only a bit of a runaround they promised to call me back within the hour. To my great surprise, they did. "There was an address exception. It will be delivered by 3 p.m. tomorrow."
At 3:45 today, I noticed that the tracking site reported that the goods were delivered and signed for by A VOIT (a misspelling of our previous receptionist's name) at 2:58. The package was not at the reception desk, the receptionist had not seen a DHL driver, and neither had A VOIT (sic). "They have my name in their system, though, and sometimes they just put it down even when I don't sign for anything." Charming.
It only took me two button presses to call DHL back. Once again, they promised to check with the driver and return my call.
Literally two minutes later, the package was delivered.
It was pretty obvious to me that the fucking delivery driver faked delivery of the package so as not to go past the 3:00 deadline, nevermind the fact that the package was already a day late and that I was therefore entitled to a refund. Shit happens, and I'm generally willing to let stuff like that slide if it doesn't cause me any real problems. Lie to me about it, and the gloves come off. I will be ruthless.
Request for refund: filed.
Formal complaint about driver: filed.
Story on internet so my friends can avoid those lying scumbags: posted.
Originally posted on patti.vox.com