Tonight was bizarre. Remember my great round of bargaining I did a couple of months ago? I kept making deals with myself so that I'd push just a little bit farther. "OK, you did eight minutes last time. If you can do eight you can do ten. ... Oh, bullshit. You're three quarters of the way through... what kind of hoser quits now?" You can go read it if you want to.
I found myself doing the same sorts of bargaining tonight, but from a completely different angle. My plan was to do the usual 5-(3)-5-(3)-5 series. It's getting to be not too difficult for me, and since I was pretty tired that seemed OK. Run run run, off I go. I got to five minutes and decided to keep going. "OK, you can do an 8-(5)-8 instead. Sure, why not?"
And then run run run, I got to eight minutes. "Hey, this isn't so bad. Wanna do a 10-(5)-10 instead? Or maybe a 10-(5)-5 if you get tired?" Fine, I can do that.
Run run, ten minutes. "What? Keep going? Listen, this is your sanity speaking. Stop that. Eh? Umm, OK. If you insist. You can just do the 15 minutes you were going to, but without breaking for walks. It'll get you home faster anyway, and I know you're tired."
Run run run, hey I like this song. Run run run, 15 minutes. "OK, fuck. Fine. Whatever. Do the full 20 minutes. You're going to anyway, so it doesn't matter what I say." My sanity threw up its hands and sulked away to huddle in the corner behind a broken elliptical.
Run run run, 20 minutes. "What? Keep going? OK, listen you. This is your sanity, and I am putting my foot down slowly and deliberately, not trotting along with this insane plan of yours. 20 minutes is quite enough. You're sleep-deprived and you have to get up early tomorrow. Stop running, cool down, and go home." Sanity for the win, finally.
But seriously, what the fuck? I'm now bargaining with myself so that I can run more than I planned, rather than tricking myself into pushing through?
The last long, monolithic run I did left me dizzy and wiped out, made me quit running for a little bit, and precipitated the whole drowning my lungs thing. Today when I was done I felt fine, and on a 1-10 scale of dizziness I was probably at about a 1.5-- well within the bounds of normal for immediately after exercising. (Your blood pressure naturally drops just after exercise, because your heart slows down but your blood vessels are still dilated.)
Tomorrow I go to the doctor so that he can decide whether I can stay off the blood pressure medicine or not. I hope the decision is off, 'cause I wasn't a big fan of that dizziness thing.